Last weekend was wonderful. I had family come in for a visit and I was already feeling tempted and weary before they even got there and wanting some food! I felt God's presence with me every step of the way and maneuvered around Krispy Kreme donuts, Reeses, Chips and Salsa, and a really wonderful looking margarita. And that was only on Friday.
Saturday, we went to the zoo and it was so hot and I wanted some ice cream dots so very much, but refrained. The kids wanted ice cream, so on the way home, I stopped and got Blue Bell.....and the kids ate one of my faves: pizza. Afterwards, I scooped some cookies and cream (one of my faves....why did I buy that again?) for the kids and my husband and refrained by God's grace. It was so hot, I wanted a wonderfully sugary drink from Sonic Drive-In, but had iced unsweet tea instead. All this time, I felt God empowering me, while showing me that it was going to be a battle sometimes every minute of every day.
While I got the kids ready for bed, I was so relieved when the temptation seemed to lift and I felt an overwhelming relief and sense of peace. I felt that God wanted me to eat an ice cream cone once the kids were in bed......and I am not making this up. At first, I was like, "No way! I've come this far and I am not going to do that now....what if I stop losing weight." And I just felt that God was saying to my heart that this is not about my weight or the scale, but about trusting in Him and realizing that I can enjoy a blessing such as ice cream every now and then. I also felt that I had put too much focus on the weight and not on my heart belonging solely to Christ.
I was very excited and enjoyed a normal sized portion of ice cream on top of a cone and felt the LORD smiling upon me. It was wonderful to feel his presence and to see what He was trying to show me and the ice cream was great....I did however, as a child would do....try to see if I could take it further and asked if I could also have a piece of pizza. To which, I felt a firm, but loving, "NO" answer. But hey, I had to ask, right?
The next day a trip to the mall was another battle all over again with all kinds of foods that are treats that I would normally indulge in since i rarely go to the mall, but by God's grace alone, I did not. I learned that as I walked through the heat of the zoo, the wonderful aromas of the foods in the mall, that my head will try to rationalize eating this or that and I have to constantly give it over to God, who is faithful to show me the way, if I will just abide and listen. I am so grateful for that.
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